Wednesday, 22 February 2012

Are you qualified?

Eh, I'm aware that I owe you Soc C1 and Divides C1, but they're coming I swear. Today I'm going to have a rant.

Do you know what annoys me? Not what annoys me the most, but I'm wondering if anyone is thinking what I'm thinking. There are so many everyday activities which you ought to be qualified to do before you can do.

1) Self-service Checkouts.
No ma'am, you will not find a barcode on that banana - click the fruit button and weigh the damn thing. No ma'am, it's not reasonable to moan about people moaning about you taking an age when you put your entire bloody weekly shop through the self-service. No sir, you can't use your shopping vouchers at the self-service.

Come on people! This is not rocket science. But the number of people who are seemingly unable to use the self-service efficient is mind-boggling. Can we please have practical exams for these, with usage banned until you have passed said test? It would be better for everyone.

2) Internet sites which allow you contact with other people:
I'm sorry love, what did you just say? I'm afraid I don't speak batshit-stupid. I speak English, a little French, a miniscule amount of German and "hello" in several other languages (from Russian to Portuguese). Don't expect me to understand "OMFG, y r pepl so meen? Dey awl sey i shud lern 2 spel", because your language skills are just...catastrophically, monstrously terrible.

Go away, learn to spell, and come back when your mental age is more than five. (Hell, I could spell better than that at five.)

3) Work:
Now this one may seem a little odd - you already need qualifications to work - but I'm talking about a different type of qualification.

A friend of mine, who is under eighteen, went into three inner-city game shops and bought three 18's. How many times was he ID'd? Not even once. Games ratings are no longer just suggestions, since...2008 I think... they've been LAW. The amusing thing? On every one of those receipts it states there there was age verification given. No such thing happened in any of those shops.

Onto something a little more serious than a few games, a friend of mine has a brother (who is actually over eighteen, thankfully). He is always ID'd for alcohol... if he's shaved recently, which doesn't happen a lot because he likes beards. People! Beards =/= ID. Please would you start doing your jobs properly, you sexist morons.


This is just a few examples of things I think need a/more qualification(s). The list goes on for a while...

As a new part to my posts, I'm going to try to help people broaden their vocabularies. Here's three words, the definitions of which I will release next time I post:

See y'all next time,


  1. I stumbled across your blog while searching for rumors about the casting of Sebastian Verlac, and I absolutely love your postings. Do I always understand what you're talking about? No, but when I do, I laugh so hard. Thank you.

    1. Thank-you to you as well, it's always nice to hear from people who like my writing. I haven't really been posting much lately, but this might prompt me to do so. And it's also nice to find TMI fans! :)

      I think your comment has made my day, so thank-you again and if there's anything you'd like me to clarify I'd be happy to do so :D